This month I was privileged to interview a truly remarkable person in Nashville’s Jewish community, Eileen Handler who just turned 100 years old. I was moved by our conversation and decided to step from behind the byline to share the experience.
I first met Eileen through her son and fellow West End Synagogue congregant, Jim Handler. At the time, Eileen was still living in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, where she’d lived for many years while raising her family. She moved to Nashville 11 years ago to be closer to her son, and these days she holds court at Abe’s Garden, surrounded by friends and visitors.
When I arrived for our chat, I was directed to her room, and she met me at the door with a smile and a hug, and we settled in. I asked her to start with some background. She is the sixth of eight children. Longevity runs in the family; Eileen’s sister died ten years ago at the age of 103
Eileen:
My mother was one of nine children. Her uncle sponsored her and her brother to come to America from Lithuania. When they saved enough money, they brought two more, and then two more. The two youngest stayed with the parents and then Hitler came and wiped out all the Jews.
A cousin introduced my mother to my father in America. My sisters say they were from the same town in Lithuania but didn’t know each other. But they had some common interests, so that drew them together. They married, the cousin put them up in a grocery store business. He was in Little Rock at the time, and he moved to New York. So we were all raised in the Bronx. And then we all grew up and went to different places.
I met my husband, I was five years old, and he was five years old. He was half year older than me. Our sisters were best friends. Three years later, his family moved to Washington, DC. His father took a position with the government. He moved to Washington, DC, and we used to correspond as eight-year-olds a little. In one of his letters, he says, we're eating ice cream. He said, I would send you some, but I'm afraid it would melt.
So then we just drifted apart with no correspondence or anything. And about 12 years later, when I was 20 or 20, I was visiting my sister who had moved to Washington, DC. I said, let's call up the Handlers.
I've been there two years before. We never did call the Handlers. And I said, this time, let's call the Handlers. And it was a rainy day, and normally, Dick would be out on the river sailing. When he was 17 years old, his sister bought him a canoe. And he and his mother made sails, and he set put this sliding seat on the canoe, and so he had a sailboat. So that was in his blood. And you should know, it's in all my children's blood. He came over to see us. It was dinner. Just after dinner time, we had three dates in three days, and he proposed.
Ten months later, he wanted me to go on a trip with him. He was paddling canoes, with college crew up in New York, upstate New York, and I said my mother wouldn't let me travel with man unless I was married. So, we got married. A month later. I was going to say, let's wait four years when you're out of college, because he was going to school on a GI Bill, the University of Maryland. So anyway, so I was going to CCNY City College of New York and studying to be an accountant. And he was living in Washington. I was living in New York, and once a month we traveled. One month, I'd go down see him next month and come and see me. When we got married, we lived with the in laws for a couple of years. And my mother-in-law thought it would be so nice to have a baby. I gave her a baby.
After the first baby, Eileen went to work to help support her growing family. She and her husband, Dick, were living in Northwest Washington, DC while he finished school in Maryland. Her first part time job was at the famous Zabar’s grocery in their bakery department. Eventually Dick completed his college education and the young family was on the move again. From Levittown, Pennsylvania, to Illinois, to Virginia, and eventually landing in Oakr Ridge, Tennessee.
Eileen:
That was in ‘63 Joanne was four years old then, and Kathy was 14, and my boys are in between. Jim was 10 and John was five. He brought these kids up to like sailing. for the two youngest they wanted their own boat for the bar mitzvahs. And then he organized a University of Tennessee sailing club.
In Oak Ridge, my husband used to inspect the installations. And he always told me, it's clean. It's clean. I didn't realize. He didn't talk about his job. They had to put on suits and radiation detectors. And he always said Oak Ridge is clean. So you know what killed him?
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Well, he got cancer.
Eileen’s husband died 19 years ago after nearly 60 years of marriage. She lived by herself for the next eight years and it was during a stay at Vanderbilt Hospital that her son Jim and his wife, Barbara, asked her to stay in Nashville. She agreed and never went back to Oak Ridge.
Asked to what she attributes not only her longevity, but her vitality, and Eileen lists her many volunteer positions, saying she was president and treasurer of almost every organization she was involved with. She is a recipient of the Volunteer of the Year award from West End Synagogue, which recognizes her work outside of the Jewish community. She also received the Distinguished Senior Award from Leading Age, a national organization which focuses on non-profit programs addressing housing and services for the elderly.
Eileen has traveled to Israel twice. For her 40th wedding anniversary, she says her children sent her and her husband to Hawaii. On their 50th anniversary, the family sent them to Europe.
These days Eileen spends her time at Abe’s Garden enjoying life, seeing friends, and having weekly calls with her family which now numbers four children, 11 grandchildren, and 11 great-grandchildren. For the past 10 years, she has been knitting hats and scarves for the homeless.
To celebrate her milestone birthday, Eileen’s family came from all over the country to enjoy a weekend of festivities. Of course the goodies she received included a package from Zabar’s.
